Mythzone Chapter 9: Evilly Blonde
The three of us got into rather imposing stances for the fight that was about to begin, with Amy pulling out her wolfish ribbon and placed it close to her chest and Sun placing a finger up to a golden headband that I hadn’t really noticed until then. Me, on the other hand, I simply drew out my shinai, switched into Puss in Boots mode, and immediately tried to charge at the enemy ahead.
My assault was, however, cut short by the airhead making a barrier in the shape of an eyeball, which that shot a laser trail towards me, making a wall of water shoot out of the floor. Said water left a salty stench to it, and was from her eyes. Wait, does that mean that she was using her tears to block me? Oh God, I hadn’t even thought of that before!
Anyway, the part of me that got hit with her water felt like it was turned into several strands of wet spaghetti, heavy, limp and cold.
Outraged, I shouted at the airhead who did it, "What's the matter, miss?! Afraid to get your pretty little face messed up by my friends and I?!"
Our foe simply lowered her shield and responded, "Just because a girl doesn't have her sight, that doesn't give you the right to just gang up and totally destroy her and that special trait she has. What the Grimm?!"
She’s blind? I thought, Then how come she knows about my eyepatch? As if to respond to my thoughts, our enemy answered, “You’re totally wondering how I could’ve known about your eyepatch if I said I was blind, aren’t you? Well, Mr.Nosy, I know because my minions tell me everything by sending me messages via their own thoughts. Noticed those...thingies on their chests? That, um, uh..what’s it called when you talk with your mind?”
“Telepathy, Ms..?” Pinocchio answered as he looked up the word in his big book’s dictionary section, lucky duck.
“First off, it’s Raven, shorty, and second, thanks for the english lecture.” Our enemy, named Raven for everyone’s convenience, sarcastically replied with joy.
Pinocchio, being as dense as the wood that made him, simply smiled and replied happily, “You’re welcome, Miss Raven.”
“Anyway, I telepathically get the word from my mom and my minions about everything, reason why I totally know about everything in this lair!” Raven said informing us about her nonconformity.
Wasting no time in getting to the fight, Amy shouted, “Once upon a time, Red Riding Hood!” At the mere instant she bellowed that phrase, her wolfen ribbon shone so bright it could’ve rivaled the new headlights Matt had for his truck, and those things were blinding even in the daytime too!
Following suit, Sun Wukong tapped his golden headband and shouted, “Victorious Fighting Buddha, Sun Wukong, 72 Transformations: Normal State!” Again there was a flash of light but it was thankfully more subdued, otherwise I would’ve been blind as a bat from looking at both Amy and Sun’s transformations.
Not one to feel left out, I asked Puss if he could let me transform as well, to which he pointed out, “Of course, but you’re not exactly up to snuff for getting a full helping of my power yet, so you’ll only be able to have some light armor. Is this acceptable?”
My response was a rather annoyed, “Yes!” “Then let us equip yourself.” I instantly found myself in a ball of light of my own, my surroundings transfiguring into a fancy hall with a lion of pure metal looking down at me.
Before I could react to the new creature, it began to speak in the voice of Puss. “Orco Assassino Armatura: Forma Primaria!” Following this outburst, the metal lion pounced on me and soon wrapped its paws around my entire body as it became a cat-themed suit of armor.
The inadequacy that Puss mentioned before must’ve came in the form of the armor having only kitty ears on the helmet and some small metal claws on my gloves and boots. Other than that the armor looked pretty cool!
On a side note, as I changed, I noticed that Amy and Sun both had changes of their own: Amy was now surrounded by a pack of vicious, silver-furred wolves, their knife-like teeth bared at their mistress’s foe. The beams of a blood moon had woven themselves into her trademark red cloak, making her appear more violent and full of bloodlust. Sun had cocooned himself into a giant jagged rock which shook uncontrollably from within. The rock suddenly bursted open to reveal Sun draped in fancier robes then his usual ones, with metallic armor protecting him from body blows. If the rock aspect wasn’t strange enough, Sun had morphed his being into that of a golden furred monkey, strange markings enveloping his entire body. You can call this an abnormal sight to observe, but seeing all the stuff I witnessed would make it seem tame in comparison, right?
Anyway, the three of us, sans Pinocchio, were in our outrageous combat fatigues and ready to tackle the so-called Raven with our might. “Get ready to howl in fear, foul one, for Red Riding Hood is ready to give your evil ways the axe!” Amy proclaimed with determination as she struck a pose that no doubt showed off her prowess with her blade. Following suit, Sun pulled a staff out from his ear lobe, spun it over his head and did some rather impressive (if not ridiculous) tricks with it before he screeched, “I believe it’s time that I, Sun Wukong: The Victorious Fighting Buddha, make a monkey out of you, heh-hee!”
Amy groaned at Sun’s antics but nevertheless posed alongside her compatriot of justice, with me realizing that I had to come up with something too considering that I changed as well. Almost at the top of my head, I declared “Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! How long I’ve waited!” Everyone, including our foe Raven, was baffled by how suddenly my voice changed into something big, booming, and bombastic by wearing a feline suit of armor. “Who are you exactly? And what’s with the wardrobe?” was Raven’s response as I noticed how she already had minions of her own by her side, no doubt providing her with good enough sight to look at me.
“My master needs no introduction, for I, Puss in Boots, shall raise my sword and strike quick and true that it shall rival the speed of lightning! You will know my name is the destructor when your hive of villainy comes crashing down, comprende?” I announced as I picked up my shinai again, splitting into the sharp twin swords I wielded back in the training gate, only this time they looked more like a cross between traditional European swords, Japanese katanas and traditional sushi knives (also Japanese, I know) that shone brightly with a golden hue.
I had little time to be mesmerized by my swords and their radiance, for at that very moment Raven delivered an over the top performance of her very own when it came to her introduction. "Oh ho ho ho ho! The lovely Raven shall make these petulant peasants kneel before herself lest they draw their terminal breaths in defiance, but what ever shall be the odds of that occurring, hmm? Totally not today, ho ho ho!"
“You shall falter and fall to our combined might, my dear, though you shall provide us with but a moment’s amusement.” I retorted in objection to Raven’s miniature speech. “I concur, my feline compatriot”, Sun interjected, “this young contemptuous sow shall taste the bittersweet flavor known as defeat, be it from my staff and multitude of tricks or from you and miss Amy’s blades. It matters not!”
Amy, rather begrudgingly, added to our conversation by declaring, “Young Lady Raven, by the end of this confrontation, consider your wings...clipped!” It was quite obvious that the way she delivered her line indicated she wasn’t exactly thrilled to add her two cents into the mix, but peer pressure is a power force to reckon with. I couldn’t help but feel a tad sorry for her by making a complete fool of myself through Sun and my performances.
Before I could apologize for my asinine act, Raven’s minions charged towards us and bellowed an otherworldly screech to rival the likes of a banshee’s frightful wails. Sun started our counterattack by making more hair clones, give or take five, and each one had a staff of their own as they enlarged to monstrous proportions.
You’d think that would put an end to those little beasts and we’d go straight for Raven, right? Well, that’s what we thought too, until one of them managed to piece himself together with the remains of his brethren and became a sort of centipede that could only be found in your nightmares, not helped by how its face gained compound eyes and how it attributed to the ideology that continuous exposure to that horrifying mug would physically hurt you!
“Holy Franz Kafka! What is that, what even, IS THAT!?” My compatriots and I bellowed in unison rather quickly. Raven simply chortled before delivering her answer. “You actually think I wouldn’t be prepared for your arrival after your little show in the foyer? You lacerated all of my mother’s servants faster than you could say ‘More tea, milady?’, and you fools honestly believe that little show wouldn’t ring any alarm bells? Prepare to feel only a smidgen of my mother’s vengeful wrath, ha ha ha!”
Some more of Raven’s minions that weren’t part of the… I don’t really want to describe it, thing that the rest of them became pulled up a rather refurbished wooden chair out into the middle off the hallway for their boss to rest on, simultaneously giving her a folding fan to wave in her face, cementing her as a lesser of two evils; the valley girl and the noblewoman.
I would’ve certainly enjoyed to silence the terrifying tart and her seemingly perpetual laughter and the smug grin that came with it, but considering that she sicked that horrific humanoid centipede monster at us, that would have to wait. The beast, named the Manservipede, for everyone’s convenience including mine, lunged its makeshift mandibles at Amy and I as Sun dodged out of the way with another one of his magic clouds (lucky primate jerk, not even offering a lift up).
Amy and I brandished our weapons at the Manservipede and gave the abomination a few slashes here and there on its abdomens, which ultimately accomplished nothing as the beast put itself back together by forcing its lesser cohorts into itself. “What?!” I exclaimed in frustration. “Another wonderful fruit of mother’s labor. The more you slice it, the more it regenerates!” Raven gloated as more minions came flooding into the stead of those that were absorbed.
“Alright, so we have to cut this frightful monstrosity into so many pieces that it’ll have a difficult time putting itself back together then?” I inquired Pinocchio as I withdrew my swords for a moment while Amy continued to battle the Manservipede. Pinocchio pulled his book out, skimmed through the pages concerning Mythzonian monsters and responded woefully, “I don’t know if that’ll work, sir. It would be an impossibility to even get it to the required segments considering what miss Raven informed us.”
I simply unsheathed my blades, and with determination rising in each word, yelled, “There’s a first time for everything, little man, and this overgrown garden pest is gonna have a bad taste in its mouth in the flavor of defeat!”
I charged towards the Manservipede like I did at the start of the battle, only this time I didn’t have to worry about a stream of tears making my limbs numb for some reason. I slashed the thing’s mandibles clean off, followed by Amy’s claws slicing the head into tiny pieces, which were then devoured by her hood which transformed itself into the head of a wolf that exact moment.
Without the head, we figured the monster would go down like a person tripped over a sidewalk, well, that didn’t happen. Instead, the monster made a new head out of its lesser segments and was more furious than ever! Changing our strategy, Amy and I decided to sever the Servipede’s segments from each other while Sun used his knowledge of the staff to squash the smaller pieces flat before it could regenerate.
Sadly, not even all of that was enough to kill the Manservipede as it regrew itself, now with smaller versions of itself and each one sharing the bloodlust of the original. “I don’t get it, we tried everything to stop it from recovering! By Grimm, this’ll take forever at this rate!” Amy exclaimed in frustration as the Manservipede used one of its sharp legs to try and do to her as she did to it, namely tear her apart limb from limb.
Raven, as usual, gloated her deformed and delusional head off at all of this, but not before she berated us for trying to kill her mother’s creation. It wasn’t until I saw the brooch on her dresses’ neckline that I realized something that I would’ve noticed by then if I hadn’t remembered every adventure game I played up to that moment: destroying Raven means the death of the Manservipede!
Realizing this, getting Amy and Sun to realize this and attack was easier than getting the Happily Ever After Fighter: The Animation box sets on my birthday after aunt Marian’s eyes popped right out of their sockets due to my last report card..
Okay, I may have exaggerated that last part. Getting Amy and Sun to realize Raven’s weakness was the easy part. It was landing the blow that was easier said than done when she realized her inability to keep her weak spot covered.
The little she-witch used her eyeball barrier and tear stream trick again, the only difference being that she was using her own eyes as well as the tear geyser-making laser beam, and seeing how those eyes were stitched shut it wouldn’t have surprised me if they were actually suffering from scleritis (which is the inflammation of that white part of the eyes called the sclera if anyone’s wondering). Sure enough they did and those horrific eyes were the size of cocker spaniels!
Raven’s eyeballs spewed bloody tears at us like they were gigantic riot control fire hoses, only difference being that they were a part of her body. Once again, I found myself hit with the salty spray, only this time the armor around me felt like it gained two or three tons. Nevertheless, I held my blades in determination and furious anger, poised to make sure that the last thing Raven heard was the sound of my blade slicing horizontally through her neck, which was a rather sweet act to fulfill.
Raven’s newly removed head rolled onto the battlefield, momentarily disabling her from preventing another attack. She was primed for a swift death, but unfortunately her Manservipede was still standing upright. In fact, the only real monster left in the room was Raven’s still animate decapitated head as her body lied there motionless as a corpse. “What did Amy tell ya? Clipped like a bird, baby, ha ha!” I gloated right back at Raven. Raven, for some reason was grinning cheek to cheek despite her loss, which confused us at the time. “Fine, fine, go ahead and laugh, but mark my words! When you meet my mother, you’ll totally be wishing it was me who killed you like the rabid dogs that you are. Oh hohohohohohoho!”
Not wanting to hear another peep out of that spoiled rotten alpha brat, I asked Amy if I could use her axe to finish her off. Amy gladly handed over her Lycan Hunter Tomahawk into my possession., “Do it quick, she might bite one of our hands off. No pressure, though.” she warned. As I lifted Amy’s axe over my head, it’s tougher than it sounds, believe me, Raven looked like she was ready to burst into tears as she rapidly started to utter a plea for her life repeatedly begging,“Please, don’t kill me, my prince, don’t do it!”
“Really? You want me to spare you after you said that your mother’s going to kill me?” I asked Raven as her head shook like gelatin. “I also recall that you were laughing your head off while we were fighting for our lives against an insectoid Frankenstein’s monster that would make little kids hide under their beds for cover and cry out for their mommies and daddies..” I added. “Besides, I’m not your prince, you haughty little bimbo!”, I exclaimed before the axe went down, silencing Raven permanently. Amy simply held a look of slight shock and respect as she pulled her axe off the ground where Raven’s head was cleaved in two, no longer uttering a single word as it decayed slowly but surely alongside her body, with the Manservipede following suit.
“Guess she’ll be needing some aspirin for that splitting headache of hers, am I right, Jacob?” Sun queried in a jocular tone, proceeding to nudge my shoulder to make sure I got his little joke. “Mr.Wukong, too soon, sir!” Pinocchio shouted worriedly as he pulled Sun away from me and closer towards him. “Don’t worry, it’s okay, I’m good now.” I assured my companions as I wiped some dust off my shirt and uniform’s jacket.
“Oh, th-that’s good to hear, Mr.Davidson. I was worried about you turning into that monster from the training gate again.” Pinocchio replied with a sigh of relief. As he exhaled, the little guy wrote down some stuff in his compendium of information of all kinds. I asked him what he was writing. “I’m making a note of all our adventures together and the strange new creatures, people and locations that come with them. Or at least that’s what Miss Athena told me to do when she gave me the book.” Pinocchio explained.
When queried whether Athena also provided him with his glasses, Pinocchio nodded in response. Switching back to Cheshire found me being forced to take Pinocchio's glasses off and see the reason as to why they were on his face to begin with: He was an intolerable lying twerp that tried to weasel his way out of stealing my sword without consequences!
It was a good thing that his nose still grew when he lied, that and Athena or Nemesis apparently made it so that he'd ALSO felt like he was being eaten alive by termites, probably to help him understand the error of his ways better than a long nose ever could, otherwise he would've stolen my wallet too! Amy made sure to place the glasses back on Pinocchio's face to help us avoid another disaster, using her Tomahawk's special power to give herself a pretty strong werewolf-like claw to hold the timber wood terror down while she got Sun to finish the job.
Two or three minutes of kicking and screaming later, we got the old Pinocchio back, only totally not happy with what just happened. A quick apology from Cheshire and I persuaded him to cool his jets, but as the stubborn kitten refused to come out publically,I had to travel inside my head to strongarm the mangy cat to say he was sorry, but in the end, we were all friendly again, so that’s what matters.
After he had finished his entries to his book's bestiary, Pinocchio got the door for us while I stopped to grab the gem left behind after Raven's body dissolved rather grotesquely. Using the stretchy appendage Cheshire made my left arm into was a big mistake. For as you see, when I grabbed the gemstone from Raven's brooch, it gave off a rather unpleasant feeling in my palm that I could've sworn was an electric charge, not to mention that I also saw brief flashes of other women that all had Raven's voice coming out of them, laughing at some other poor souls as they suffered the torment of several other monsters created by her mother, almost rivalling the Manservipede in terms of sheer magnitude and repugnance.
Shaking my head to hopefully get the foul imagery and Raven's stupid chuckle out of my mind, I wandered out the door with Pinocchio right behind me, but not before I heard another awful sound coming from beyond the walls.
Sure enough, that sound did bring forth something horrible, namely Hansel and Gretel barging through with another ugly she-demon with Peter and Nerine not too far behind.
"Wait," I began as I stood there rather puzzled, "Where's Rapunzel and Goldie?" Peter flew near us and responded, "I thought they were with you, dude."
There wasn't much time for him and I to argue as the other monster in the foreign room tried to kill some new victims at that moment, namely everyone within her eyesight (or lack thereof).
Nerine used her water manipulation to make a slippery surface for Hansel to use his giant ball form more easily. The only downside was that it also gave the rest of us a slight disadvantage on account of the wet floor making it hard to dash at the bratty beast! Thanks for nothing, you moronic mermaid!
Thankfully, Amy used her tomahawk to give herself some better lupine legs to move more fluently, and I could use the teleportation Cheshire used to close the gap (although in my case it still was hard to do), otherwise we'd have been sitting ducks while Sun and the other slayers would've stolen all the fun from under our feet.
All seven of us used all our Slayarms to dogpile on our enemy whose name turned out to be Katrina (like the hurricane, I know), and soon found ourselves another high and mighty airhead that bit off a little more than she could chew and bought the farm.
Not wanting another round of horrendous hallucinations to plague my mind, I didn't even bother grabbing Katrina's gemstone. Besides, Pinocchio picked it up before I could and he didn't complain about hearing voices for one second while he held the damn thing.
Without any hesitation, I questioned Pinocchio, “How come you didn’t get to see any hallucinations, little guy? I had to deal with them when I got Raven’s gem in my hands, yet here you are as plain as day not affected by a mindscrew. What’s the deal?”
Pinocchio just shrugged and replied, “What are you talking about, sir? After you picked up Miss Raven’s essence gem you fell onto the floor, clutching your head with both hands and screamed for a few minutes and only stopped when you shouted, ‘Get out of my head, get out of my head, you spoiled rotten villainess!’”
“Really?” I asked again, head slightly tilted. “Yes, really, Mr.Davidson.” Pinocchio replied with sincerity and a tad impatience in his voice.
Before I could ask any further questions, however, I heard the distant cries of Goldie and Rapunzel, no doubt they were in the clutches of whoever it was in charge of the beasts we’ve face and the apparent ‘Mother’ of Raven and Katrina.
Clenching my left hand in a fist and raising it up to my face, I boldly declared, “Let’s go get our payment, everyone! Time to kill us some big bad mothers, or just one if you know what I’m saying.” “Hold on, man,” Peter said in between some deep breaths, “Just let us catch our breath first and get some of that stuff you got from Osmond down our gullets, then we’ll go after the hag in charge, alright?”
I simply sighed and facepalmed myself in disbelief. They’re all immortal, why are they out of steam now? I thought. Good to know that the people who I can trust in the middle of battle can just stop as soon as they begin. In frustration, I gave Peter and the others what they wanted.
After a few minutes of drinking all the health potions and other edibles from my pack, everyone appeared more energetic and willing to take down the monster that lurked behind the middle door of the room beside Raven and Katrina’s own. The only problem we dealt with that time was that we had to insert the essence gems of both of them in a certain way or we wouldn’t get inside.
Realizing that the gems had to be placed in the order in which they were defeated in, which also included us making little clocks above them that match the exact amount of time that it took to defeat them respectively, we were all set to open the door and witness our terrifying foe. Unfortunately, it took us four minutes and thirty seconds longer than it should've to save our trapped companions, indicating we aren’t the best at puzzle solving of this calibre. Heh heh.
The door opened wide to reveal the head honcho of the manservant and maid army that we had to massacre, plus the puzzling traps that we had to escape from on more than one occasion.
A rather weak looking elderly lady who really didn’t look all that threatening aside from her nose looking a tad off. Wasn’t as frightening as I originally fought.
As I’ve learned with everyone else at that point, however, it’s always wise to not jump to conclusions about your enemy. Sure enough, the old hag tilted her head a full one hundred and eighty degrees in our direction, smiled a grin that even Cheshire would cringe at by how many crooked and chipped cavity-ridden yellow teeth could fit in her mouth at once, and spoke in a rather unsettling and sickly sweet voice, “So, you must be the awfully uncivilized trouble-makers who wish to prevent my lovelies to not get the prince of their dreams. Such naughty little pests you are, destroying their wonderful toys, somebody ought to teach you petulant fools a thing or two in proper etiquette.”
She began to morph into an unpleasant hybrid of an insect and a bird, more specifically a swan. I guess you could say that the crone was going to make the fight against us her swan song... I can't believe I even made that pun, mother of Grimm. Alongside that was Goldie and.Rapunzel both looking a tad beaten bruised but still urging to fight, finally putting to rest where they were: inside of the boss's frock, which was lying on the floor after the monster gained an exoskeleton.
The the few minutes after the battle commenced wasn't that horrible, but then again this technically was the first dungeon's final boss, you can't really get your hopes up for those kinds of bosses, know what I'm saying?
That wrinkly old atrocious arthritic abomination soon made my friends and especially myself eat our words later in the fight, namely by shoving the essence gems of her daughters into her feathery body, morphing into an even more gargantuan and grotesque version of herself, all the while cackling her rapidly shapeshifting head in a similar fashion of her daughters.
After going through her new morbid metamorphosis, the lady of the lair took on a more monstrous visage, with every sound she uttered being an unintelligible cacophony of what I can only describe as a goose’s honks and a fly’s buzzing becoming one utterly awful noise, with a hint of humanlike moans of pain and pleasure for good measure.
The new transformation certainly was more than just looks alone, the enemy gained a substantial increase of Imagination by how the air around her felt like it was about to crush us under the weight of the hairs on our heads, the fact it was about to go up in flames by how unnaturally foul it smelled demonstrated this quite well.
Drawing our weapons and transforming into our warrior forms once more, my fellow warriors and I simply gave our introductions and the monster gave us an inarticulate roar that would make the faint of heart cringe by how sickly it sounded. The battle gained a bit more interest by how her insectoid swan beak spewed rather corrosive and disgusting gall that eroded a good chunk of the floor we stood on, thus giving us an incentive to take full advantage of the footing we still possessed.
Amy, Goldie and I slashed the monster at her abdomen, lead on by Sun using his hair clones to deliver a rather bone shattering punch to her fearsome face (aided by Nerine’s Water Cuffs so that she couldn’t fight back). Hansel and Gretel then used a combo attack that involved the latter kicking the former towards our enemy like a giant soccer ball, which was then followed up by Rapunzel using her hair to trap our foe in a cocoon of follicles while she used a miniature version of her Weave of Judgement to deliver a harsh punishing punch with fire coming out of it.
This showed her knowledge of the environment around her by having the feathery terror of entomology be contained in a compact area with the same foul, and, yes, explosive, air to be dealt a quick and painful demise. Or so we thought.
The she beast was STILL kicking after having a combustible prison detonate with her inside it."The old hag just won't quit!" I shouted in dumbfounded disappointment. Our enemy clearly must've heard my little comment about her, otherwise she wouldn't have bellowed out in clear English, "I'll have your tongue ripped from your thick skull and have it served with jelly stuffed into its center for my daughters and I to enjoy, you rambunctious one-eyed master of deceiving young women!"
"What?" Was all I could reply before the decrepit demonic witch pinned me and Peter onto the floor with her surprisingly strong hands, covered in feathers and insect scales, going the extra mile by using her pincers at the end of all her fingertips to firmly grasp the floor beneath us.
"So, boys, any last words before you're done in by the ever ravishing Ada?" The monster asked gleefully mockingly in between drop breaths that uttered either bird noises or an insect's nightmarish loud buzzing.
"Yeah, mind if I take a stab at those brainless attention leeches you call daughters?" queried Peter as he used his dagger to take out one of Ada's compound insect eyes, afterwards managing to land a decent kick to her hideous face to free himself and I from Ada's steely grasp, leaving me rather impressed by him actually contributing significantly to our mission and how he made a rather, to be honest, irritatingly good pun.
Before we could get on our feet, however, Peter and I were being threatened from another being devoured whole attempt from Ada and her grotesque servants, who on a side note actually looked a bit better than their mistress. Thankfully, our salvation came in the form of something rather unexpected, namely an accordion slamming into the faces of the minions by another minion.
Upon closer examination, it turned out that the minion in question was actually a thirteen year old guy wearing a cheap dollar store suit and a Halloween mask, that and he had sneakers (something that I should’ve noticed before to determine whether he was on our side or not).
“This is all going ‘accordion’ to plan,” The strange newcomer quipped at his knocked over victims . “Now, guys!” He commanded as he turned his head to another couple of minions. Those ones also turned out to be normal people in disguise, which was revealed to me by how their disguises dissipated like ripples in water.
Our new allies came in the form of: An identical twin of the accordion guy, a young adult that was in his early twenties that shared the same eye color of the other two guys but wasn’t another identical twin (thank god), and three young ladies that clearly weren’t twins based on how diverse their appearances were.
I bring up all three of those ladies up due to them having a look not unlike Amy and the other girls that we’ve had for company, that said they clearly had a twist in their appearances to help each other stand out from the other. One had a scarlet ponytail and was rather top heavy, complemented by an elaborate gown made with several exotic flowers for each part, tulips at her feet, carnations at the tip of her dress jacket, delphinium surrounding her waist, with lilies and roses near the top ( and a daffodil in her hair).
The second one had a more plain look to her but still had a rather exquisite costume on that look more like a nightgown that you’d find in a women’s lingerie catalog. Trust me, my brother’s looked at quite a lot of those to get something for Alexis on Valentine’s Day and Christmas on more than one occasion. This one also had something on her brunette head, a nightcap strangely enough. She also had some spectacles hiding some rather sharp and colorful eyes that would give Miss White’s peepers a run for their money before too long.
Lastly, there was a blonde that had a massive set of hips that I couldn't really ignore. In fact, it may have… Uh, made a little bit of blood come out of my nose.
Well, it was mainly due to my nose getting some slight injuries on it, but still.
Wiping the little blood drips on my hand, I continued my gaze towards the blonde with the Hartman Hips. She also donned some pretty decent footwear in the form of glass slippers with golden shin guards that vastly resembled frilly stockings.
Her dress definitely showed off those hips a bit more. Not taming my perversion was how it had a bell bottom to it, complementing her ‘noticeable’ bust size, not on par with her associate with the flowery dress and scarlet ponytail, but she was far from flat as a board.
Speaking of which, the blonde girl's ponytailed friend noticed my entranced peer at her partner. "Hey, Casanova, she has eyes, you know! Focus more on the beast in front of us too, if that's not too much to handle, okay?" she pointed out disdainfully.
The blonde simply placed her hand on her friend's shoulder and reminded her, "I appreciate the assist, Jessica, but can that wait until after we eliminate the target?"
Jessica proceeded to shove her hand in between her chest, and from the depths rose a whip with spikes that no doubt resembled the thorns on a rose. The whip itself looked green like a vine, and the hilt had a thorn covered rose on it. Saying that this gal had a thing for roses would be quite the understatement.
The wide-hipped blonde followed suit by pulling a long wand out of a pocket watch on the side of her hip.The wand was rather bizarre looking to say the least. First off it, of course, had a bright red heart on the tip, because all magical girls gotta have something with a heart on it, it’s like some sort of invisible universal rule or something. Second, below the heart was a clock on top of a pumpkin, its stem balancing on a little wheel. all being balanced on a pedestal with wings too to up the weird design.Along the base of the wand were two spiraling protrusions that, I guess, had to help the blonde hold it better, not that it really mattered considering that said base resembled a typical wand you'd see at a magic show. The only difference was that it had two letter 'M's along the side. Lastly, the wand had a bottom that look a bit suspiciously like a broom, complete with yellow bristles.
“Behold, Le Mystérieux Mystique Minuit Mirage, and La Furia Floreale whip. The tools of your destruction, monster!” The nightgown lady declared as she pulled a nightcap out of the left pocket of her gown, the right one having a hole in it that she could’ve stuck two or three fingers into.
“Uh, Isabella, aren’t you forgetting something?” The young man pointed out as he brandished a pair of special-looking gloves as if he wanted the nightgown lass to finish a sentence. “Oh, and Die Tiefschlaf Saboteur!” She spoke rather quickly.
The twins played the “wa wa waaa” sound on their instruments in near perfect sync as if to berate their ally for her belated introduction to her weapon. How a simple nightcap was going to hurt the enemy was a mystery to me. While I conjured up the various possibilities, the trio of lovelies stood in a line and pulled off some rather odd poses like Amy and Sun did before.
“Bathed in the silky moonbeams of midnight and the hope for the downtrodden laborers of a time long past, I am the illusory paladin: Cinderella!” The blonde proclaimed as she held her wand up triumphantly. “A late bloomer with the scent of determination permeating everywhere from the stems and beyond, the Rosy Rioter, Beauty, is ready to show her thorns!” Jessica articulated rather faultlessly as she flaunted her flowery apparel to our insectoid foe.
Lastly, the one in the nightgown, still a tad groggy, promulgated, “I am the terror that Neverafters fear at night. I am the roach that infests the house of villainy…”, before she fell on her knees, and soon face first onto the floor. Something caused a slight electric shock that certainly did the trick and woke up our sleep deprived ally in a flash.
"I am Briar Rose, Sleeping Beauty and the nightmare to all ne'er do wells!" She speedily shouted as she pulled the nightcap over her head and posed in a way that would no doubt make her hands look like they should've been wearing the clawed gloves of a certain serial killer turned dream demon with an unsettling grin to match.
I was presumably the only person besides Pinocchio to notice, easily noticed by how the little guy was holding onto my leg as if to steady himself while he bursts into tears.
Everyone else was too busy paying attention to the trinity of new magical maidens that introduced themselves before us and Ada.
“Heh, heh, heh. Cinderella? You’ll always be that little servant girl of ours, and, when this fight is over, you shall be in that position again, and this time, there won’t be a prince for you at the end. Rather there’ll be one for all three of us, ha ha ha h-!” Ada arrogantly mocked before she was rudely interrupted by a quick pounding in the face by Cinderella’s wand (which had morphed into a hammer beforehand). “You! Talk! Too! Much! During! A! Fight Scene!” She exclaimed with each swing of the hammer going into Ada’s grotesque face, thank Grimm, and sent the old bag flying out of the room with her last swing.
The only expression that everyone could show on their faces was one of pure shock and awe. Seriously, how could anyone not be amazed by how quickly she managed to land an actually damaging blow against the beast.
Following Cinderella’s gigantic gavel being planted between Ada’s lungs and colon, the whip Jessica wielded did its job well and gave the crone a well-deserved thrashing. “Eviscerazione Vite!” Was the name of the attack Jessica did. The nightgown warrior shouted, “Albtraum-Arsenal: Befall des Menschlichen Insekten!” Her nightcap made two bugs the size of minivans launch out of it, proceeding to ram themselves into Ada’s frontside and backside, followed up by the boy in the armored gloves giving her a (rather strenuous) suplex onto the floor, making it collapse under their weight.
Jumping onto Sun’s cloud, we decided to follow them back to the foyer, but not before I heard Goldie determinedly shout, “C’mon, let’s get in on this action before our spotlights are stolen, guys!” For once I actually agreed with her, this was getting interesting and we didn’t want to miss it for the world.
To be continued…